Tired on the couch, relaxing the aching body, a cup of tea. Chillout mode after the great camp in Prague the last days.
After catching some airtime in free fall on Saturday, I enjoyed 1,5 hs in the windy tube in Prague together with friends and one of our favourite coaches Kristian Moxnes. Whenever you have the chance to fly with him, either in the tunnel or in free fall – seize the opportunity. He is super relaxed and funny at the same time and a perfect teacher.
It felt so good to feel the wind again. Of course I needed some time to get used to the round tunnel again, but after a while it was home sweet home again. I wanted to mix low speed and high speed stuff since I realized that I am too stiff for many maneuvers and I should improve the low speed flying.
Already the first day was great. Everything worked out pretty much the way I wanted and we could also fly new stuff. Headdown? No prob. Carving in both directions? Lovely. Layouts? Still a weak point but getting better. So I was fully motivated for day 2 when I cuddled up in my bed while outside winter striked back and the world turned cold and white.
Unfortunately there was a bit too much going on in my mind and I had to fight some struggles to improve and fly what I actually could fly before already. I felt so insecure, scared (actually no idea why) and lost in the afternoon, I had the feeling a could cry. Something like that always keeps me from proving my abilities in the tunnel (in free fall it is the other way round – the falling always cleans my thoughts). I think sometimes I need a little push or recognition to gain my self confidence back – which is always the most important factor that keeps me from pushing my limits. Don’t know why, but I think I often keep me from reaching my goals with that stupid insecurity, and it’s my own fault. I am just too over-critical with myself and have difficulties to enjoy success or see progress – instead, I always think of my mistakes. Not only in the tunnel – also in other parts of my life. Mox realized that and we had a smooth last session. When we went for dinner I felt good again and could enjoy the evening at the Brazilian restaurant.
Today I had two fun sessions and then it was already time to leave. But I had the satisfying feeling that I improved my skills and still had fun (even though many people wouldn’t believe it because I’m so strict to myself). And the best thing is: I will be flying in two days again! Just a short stop with my skydiving club in Vienna and uhmmm… there will be a little challenge, but hey… Life’s one big challenge, isn’t it?