But what is christmas all about?
For me this year christmas is kinda very special. I already wrote about what I try to avoid, what my plans for the holidays are and how I spend the days. I did all these things and still this year was different. Not only how I personally reacted to certain things, but also what was surrounding me.
On 23rd, right at the moment when I bought a little present for a special person, my telephone rang. I knew instantly who it would be. I had three job interviews the day before and since one company told me that they would tell me their decision at the next day at the latest, I was checking my mails more or less every ten minutes (because bad news come by mail usually) and always had the hand on my iphone in the pocket, just to make sure that I felt the vibrating alarm if I didn’t hear the sound. When I heard the voice, I thought, ok not good. But in the end the lady told me about an awesome offer and I just have to say yes. If I want, I can start there at the beginning of February. What good news. I instantly wrote to this special person I bought the present for. I really felt sad that I just couldn’t scream and hug him, because the good things are best when shared. Still, I try not to think too much about it, because I want to take the final decision after the holidays. But oh yeah!
Because christmas is about joy.
In the evening, my best friend and I finally managed some mulled wine on the christmas market. Usually we did this a few times in the weeks before christmas, but this year with me being so much in Vienna and her having a distance relationship which mostly takes place in the weekends it was almost impossible to find a day to meet up and chat. Not that you NEED mulled wine because of the warm temperatures right now, but it’s just no christmas without it. Before I went home I invited a young homeless I saw before to a warm meal and a punch and gave him a few Euros. I simply couldn’t go to my warm cosy flat after drinking punch for about 8 Euros and watch him sitting cuddled up in a sleeping bag with a candle standing in front of him. His smile and thank you was actually the best present I got.
I don’t want to tell you that I am a good person with this little story. But maybe you think about it. We all complain about how poor we are. Never enough money for travels, cars, jump tickets, tunnel. But we all have warm flats, jobs (more or less) and don’t have to sleep on the street. This is more than many have. And if I take this job offer, I will earn more money than ever before (which is still less than many people also in my age, but who cares). So maybe we should be grateful and give a little bit back from time to time. And especially when it is so easy: when I was going to Vienna on Sunday, I wanted to buy some water in the supermarket at the train station. The man in front of me counted his few cents and Euros because he wanted to buy a dinner consisting of a can of beer, a roll and a box of sardines. I couldn’t watch this. Guys, I just had bought a magazine for more than 4 Euros and he had to count his coins if he could afford getting something to eat? So I paid for him. He asked me why and I said: because I want to. He simply smiled at me and said thanks. His little moment of happiness also made me happy. You can’t change people or the world. You can change you. That is the point.
Because christmas is about giving (even if you also give throughout the year).
In Austria, you celebrate on the evening of the 24th with presents and food and drinks. Usually my brother, my grandma and I either had fondue at home or we were invited by her cousin. This year, my brother brought his US boyfriend (who is actually jewish and doesn’t even have christmas). We again had soup fondue together and presents and my 87 year old grandma, who had given up her hope for great grand children this year completely (because I seem to be rather unrealistic due to my relationship chaos and when she asked me yesterday if I had something to tell and I joked I am pregnant, she said come on, don’t fool me ^^), tried to communicate in some kind of English-German-stuff with him. He is a super nice and calm guy so he always smiled and nodded when he couldn’t imagine what she wanted to tell him. It really was a funny scenery and one year ago, no one would imagine such an evening.
Because christmas is about coming together with family and friends.
Today I enjoy a break on the couch next to my lovely small christmas tree. Maybe I will get my lazy ass up and do some sports. Grandma is roasting ducks and so the three of us will make another trip to her place. Food food food….
There is also only thing that makes me a bit sad. Since christmas is also about being with your special one and I am missing such a person for two christmases now, I feel a bit lonely too. I don’t care too much about common traditions, but I love to spoil my significant other, enjoy quality time and relax together before the year is over. Do what you always wanted to but never had time. Or just doing nothing… But ok. I can’t change it. And maybe in one year everything will be completely different again too ;-)