It might sound ironical that I am talking about rollercoaster feelings and started working in the middle of an amusement park. But it describes my last week and all that happened precisely.
It started on Monday, where I went for a nice sunny autumn run and stumbled over a stone. I fell down, hit the ground very hard and my knee was hurting for the rest of the week, swollen, bloody and every movement was difficult.
It was my second week in my part time job in the wind tunnel and slowly I started getting into the whole thing. It always takes you a little time to know everything. I really like to be there because the team is a big family and we all are working together. Also, the whole situation with M relaxes a bit, it’s still creepy as the Prater during night, but I think it’s the best we can hope for at the moment. There is a lot to do in order to build up a marketing structure, but I’ll give my best to contribute a part. I will write a review of the tunnel itself later, since it is a really nice place to fly.
I recognized that I hardly have a life outside the tunnel as long as I am in Vienna. Sure, I don’t know too many people there but it’s always the same: working until the evening, going down, always meeting people you know or fly on your own, hanging around, going home at 10. I just imagine how this would be if I did that job permanently. It’s really weird. Also, that I don’t have a fixed place to stay makes it hard for me to get a better feeling about the city. Most of the time I just feel lost and lonely there. In two weeks I get the flat of friends, so I hope I will have the chance to enjoy some time downtown or visit an exhibition.
Where there is light, there is shadow too. I got 4 job refusals within 7 days, most of them of companies I’d really like to work at and all of them with “oh it was super close”. This is frustrating, depressing and making me crazy. I just don’t know what to do anymore, where to apply, what to change. Everyone tells me, you will see, this will make sense one day, but hey, I don’t give a fuck about this anymore. i just want to have a full time job I enjoy at least a little bit, to earn money, to be able to start planning again and to get this burden off from me.
I flew on Tuesday with a friend and joined the Frequent Flyer Evening on Wednesday, where pros and notsopros fly together with an instructor and the general manager from the tunnel. It is great fun, you try stuff you probably never tried before and it was a group of people I knew from jumping. Still, I couldn’t be as happy as I was supposed to be. And my knee also was a little problem. I also wanted to fly on Thursday but unfortunately there was a lot of work to do and since I went home on that evening, I had to finish it.
Friday was concert day, Fink and Friska Viljor in Linz and I so fell in love with the Swedes. Currently I just listen to their music all the time :-) I had a little conversation via messages with Mr. H. and it also left me kinda unsure what to think about it. Seems like the story of my life now.
Tomorrow a new week starts. New week, new chances right? I’m not so sure anymore. The only things I am really looking forward to is Whiskey the office dog and the cooperation with one of the currently greatest skydiving video dudes. Always find the good in everything. Gnah.